


Hard Line

by Sebtea



Series: Lines of Life [3]
Category: Hawkeye (Comics), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Heart Break, I have no clue where this is going, M/M, We'll see I guess, but hey super nanny, it's either angst or fluffy, it's kind of bad but enjoy i guess, sad things i guess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-15 19:18:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11812509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sebtea/pseuds/Sebtea
Summary: So Pepper leaves Tony and Clint is there to help.I have no clue where this is going. I made it up on the fly and will probably continue to do that.Enjoy I guess





	1. Drink Myself to Sleep

People often like to think that Tony was an asshole. Tony liked to keep it that way. If people thought he was an asshole then that meant it was harder for them to get close. If it was harder for them to get close then they were a lot less likely to rip his heart out. Literally and figuratively.

Ever since it had happened literally Tony thought that the figurative way wouldn't hurt anymore. That is until Pepper drew a line in the sand. A hard line that Tony wasn't sure what to do about.

"It's either me or them."

Them being the suits. She was tired of worrying. She was tired of being afraid of losing him. Of being kidnapped again. He understood. That's why he had tired to give it up for her. But... he couldn't.

At that hearing ages ago he said that he and Iron Man were the same thing. Nothing had changed. He had gotten the arc reactor taken out but nothing had changed. He was still Iron Man and he couldn't get rid of that. He couldn't let that go. Not even for Pepper.

"I have to leave."

He nodded as he stared down at the glass of whiskey in front of him. He knew that this would be her choice to make. He knew that in staying as Iron Man he would lose her. He knew that and he had to accept it.

Her hand was warm on his hair and he expected her to lean down and kiss him. Like she used to. She didn't. She left. He listened to her heels click over to the elevator and then she was gone. And he was all alone.

There was only one way to deal with being all alone.

Get drunk.

 

"She drew a hard line! Like she dug that stick into that sand and I fucking blew it up!" He was yelling at someone. Someone had been asking him why he was drinking and he was answering the question.

"Don't you think you should probably stop?"

"No! Fuck that! I know how life is! I ran the numbers. If I drink enough I'll die."

"I won't let you."

"There's nothing to live for."

"I'll tell you all the reasons to live once your sober."

"Fuck you."

"Night night, Tony."

 

Tony woke up with a mouth full of cotton and a head full of cotton. Was he made out of cotton? Was he just a voodoo doll?

"You really do know how to party."

Tony groaned at the voice that came with sunlight. Why were the blinds open? Jarvis should close that shit cause it was killing him.

"No that would be the drinking."

Rolling over to hid his face from the light Tony's brain started a reboot sequence as he tired to figure out who was talking to him, why he was on the floor and what smelled like puke.

"Pepper?" His voice was rough like he hadn't used it ever. Binge drinking had been a bad idea.

"She's gone on a vacation. Is that what the drinking was about?"

He rolled to face the voice and found Clint sitting cross legged on the couch.

"Get out." He was good at being an asshole. But it was hard when you had the love of your life walk away with your figurative heart. He had planned to propose. He had planned to give her what had been his literal heart for a while. But then he had fucked up. He was always fucking him. He was a mess and now he was all alone. 

"You know, one of my favourite things about this tower is Jarvis." Fuck. Clint was still here and there were tears in Tony's eyes. Rubbing his face he pressed it into the floor hoping Clint would leave or he'd suffocate. "At first it was kind of creepy. But slowly it became comforting. It was like always having a friend there. A constant reminder that you're not alone. Especially when he can call other people in the tower to let them know when you're feeling lonely."

Tony thinks about the times where he was up late and Jarvis would let him know when someone else woke up. They'd hang out in the TV room and watch stupid things together. Jarvis had a way of bringing people together. Or reminding people that they weren't alone.

"What're you getting at?"

"Nothing. But Imma watch Super Nanny cause Phil has me addicted." The TV turned on and for a moment Tony wondered if Clint was really going to let him get away with it. "You gonna lay there?"

Nodding his head Tony closed his eyes. Maybe this is what he needed over drinking himself to death.


	2. Being Upright Sucks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony has slept away his hangover, mostly.  
> He thinks about Pepper.

_Pepper had a great smile. It was the kind of smile that made you want to get up the next day. Tony had spent a large part of his life not wanting to get up. But for a long time, Pepper had made it worth while. She kicked his ass into gear when he needed it. She argued with him. She made him feel less crazy. Lately it felt like she was making him feel more crazy._

_But that wasn’t her fault._

_It was his. Tony was difficult to deal with. He knew that. He had known that for the better part of his life. His dad would never let him forget. So he knew that when he lost the greatest thing in his life it wasn’t Pepper’s fault. It was his._

 

 

“Tony. You need to get up.”

Tony grumbled at Clint. Why was Clint still here? How long had it been? Was he still hungover? Something bumped into him and he turned his head causing it to ache.

Yup. Still hungover.

Opening his eyes, he glared at the little vacuum that he had made for the floor. Apparently, the bastard was cleaning or something. Who said that he could?

“J?” He grumbled as wally continued to bump into him wanting to clean where he was laying.

“Wally was deployed after Agent Barton made a mess in the kitchen. He is very persistent to clean everything before considering the job is done.”

Tony glared at Wally though the robot just beeped at him unhappily. He didn’t want to move.

“Isn’t that copyrighted?”

Tony shifted to look at Clint who was staring down at him with an amused look on his face. All his smile lines creasing his face beautifully.

“It’s spelled differently.”

“Of course.” Clint said with an eye roll. Too lazy to actually say words Tony told him to fuck off in ASL. Clint laughed and it made Tony smile a bit.

“Get up so Wally can clean and so that you can eat.”

“Not hungry.”

“Okay. But there’s coffee.”

Tony grumbled again. He wanted coffee. That was so unfair that Clint knew that coffee would probably actually make him move.

Sitting up slowly his bones ground into each other and different parts of his body popped as he got up. He was too old for laying on the floor. Wally beeped happily and set about cleaning where Tony had just been laying. Patting the square disc fondly Tony got up the rest of the way with a groan.

God. He was getting old.

“C’mon old man.” Clint teased him making Tony flip him off again.

“What’d you make?” Tony asked as he made his way towards the kitchen.

“Well I tired to make something healthy and shit. Yeah. I brunt that and the kitchen as an awful mess. Then I ordered pizza.”

Tony smiled at the box that was resting in the middle of the island. It was from his favourite place. The place that he flew all the way to New York to get, cause the pizza in L.A. couldn’t even measure up to it.

He wasn’t sure if Clint knew that it was his favourite pizza. Or if Jarvis had helped him. He didn’t care. Pizza was exactly what he needed he realized as his stomach growled.

After coffee.

Everything came after coffee.

Pouring himself a huge cup he took a long sip and sighed into the mug. God, that was good.

 

 

_“You drink coffee like it’s the only thing keeping you alive.”_

_“Pepper, it is the only thing keep me alive.”_

_Pepper came around the island and straightened Tony’s tie. Not that it needed to be straightened but because she wanted to be closer to Tony. Her hands rested on his chest once she was finished and she smiled at him._

_“I actually think that I spend a lot of time keeping you alive.”_

_Tony rolled his eyes, “Yeah. But everyone knows that. Coffee is like my gas and you’re the engine.”_

_“How touching. Now let’s go.” Pepper pressed a kiss to Tony’s lips before turning away her heels clicking as she went. Tony wanted her go and he wondered if she understood that the engine was the heart of the car._

_He brushed that thought away. Everyone knew that._

 

 

“So has Captain Ice put you on babysitting duty?” Tony asked as he moved towards the box of pizza. Clint had sat beside it happily already eating some.

“Babysitting? What’re you talking about?”

“Isn’t that why you’re here? So I don’t drink myself to death and ruin the team?” Tony made a face. None of that was really supposed to be said out loud. But it was too late for him to take it back now.

Clint merely shook his head hardly considered with what Tony had just said. “Nah I was just hanging out with you. You want me out of your hair, I’m gone.”

Tony narrowed brown eyes at Clint and wondered if he really meant that. People didn’t usually mean things like that. People usually didn’t care about Tony cause he was an asshole. Clint must know that by now.

Taking a slice from the box Tony didn’t say anything to Clint’s words. He wasn’t sure what he could say. He could get Clint to leave sure, but he wasn’t sure if that was what he wanted.

They ate their slices in silence for a while. Tony polished off one and had just started another when he finally decided to break the silence.

“Wanna watch something on TV?”

“Supernanny tickle your fancy?”

“I’ve never actually watched it. I feel like I wouldn’t enjoy it much.”

“Fair. What you got in mind?” Clint asked as he leaned back taking a sip of his own coffee.

“Don’t know. I was thinking something funny. Brooklyn Nine Nine?”

Clint perked up and nodded happily, “Fuck yeah. I’ve just started watching that.”

“Just started?” Tony echoed, before smiling. “Looks like we got a lot of show to cover. Let’s go.”


End file.
